Note: I'm sorry for the poor picture quality, my smartphone isn't very smart when it comes to taking pictures!
EM: Ellie Mae Kat [black, gorgeously floofy lady cat]
MK: Momma Kat [Ellie's human Momma, named Kat]
Vet: Ellie's vet
Vet: Yes. I have a degree from a school.
EM: I'm not falling for this again! "Let's go see the vet," you say. Yeah, RIGHT!
Featured posts:
Bear's adventures at the vet are legendary ...
{The vet walks in the room}
Vet: And who do we have here?
EM: MY NAME IS ELLIE MAE.
Vet: Hi, Ellie ...
EM: Are you a real vet?
Vet: Umm ...
EM: You aren't sure?
Vet: No! No! I'm a vet!
EM: So you have a degree? Like from a school?
Vet: Yes. I have a degree from a school.
EM: But NOT clown school, right?
Vet: No. Not clown school. Vet school.
EM: A good one?
Vet: I guess.
EM: I should warn you.
Vet: You're going to bite me?
EM: WHAT?!?! No! I'm a LADY! I don't BITE.
Vet: So why are you warning me?
EM: My brofur is a crapper.
Vet: Aren't we all?
EM: No. My brofur is a cat rapper with street cred and everything!
Vet: Oh, my.
EM: If you hurt me, he will fluffing funk you up!
Vet: He's your brofur? What does that mean?
EM: Erm ... hmmm ... he's my ... {mumbling} ... with fur.
Vet: Your what?
EM: Ask me next time, I have to check with Latte, my sisfur. She knows everything.
Vet: So you have a brother and a sister in the home?
EM: NO. Well, yes. My brofur lives in a box though.
Vet: A litter box? Because he's a crapper?
EM: NO. A white box. He doesn't talk to me.
Vet: Oh, no! I'm sorry! You must miss him.
EM: No. He never talked to me. If my Momma put his box in his cat bed, it would be like old times. Well, except that he couldn't give me dirty looks for existing like he used to.
Vet: Oh.
EM: But my sisfur is really smart! She didn't believe me when I told her I was dead. I don't know how she figured it out.
Vet: You told her you were dead?
EM: Are you paying attention? Don't you have to pay attention in vet school or do they let you graduate regardless?
Vet: Okay. Yes. I see.
EM: So if a box comes in and gives his name as The Quack Daddy, he's with me.
Vet: Umm ... what?
EM: But if he speaks in Spanish, you're in extra big trouble.
Vet: What?
EM: Spanish! The language of the Span people! They don't teach you Spanish in vet school? What happens if you see a cat from Span?
{Pause}
EM: Momma, how do you say, "I'm The Quack Daddy" in Spanish? It's only fair we warn her!
{Confused silence}
MK: "Iz speako no Spaineesh!" Hahaha.
EM: MOMMA! You know I hate when you speak Spanish! I can't understand Spanish!
Vet: Umm ... what?
EM: Psst! Momma?! I think Bear would be proud!
MK: Yes. I think so.
EM: Okay! Put me in my carrier. I'm ready to go home.
Vet: Umm ... what?
MK: Ellie, we talked about this.
EM: You said we were visiting the vet! We visited! Now it's time to go home!
MK: Why don't you let the vet look at you?
EM: SHE CAN SEE ME! Or, wait.
{Pause}
EM: {narrowing her eyes} You're not a BLIND vet, are you? Bear's right! Momma, you ARE cheap! Saving a few dollars by taking us to see a BLIND vet!
Vet: NO! I'm not blind! I'll be quick, I promise.
EM: Quick doing ....
{Pause}
EM: HEY, NOW! I don't like you like that!
Vet: That's a good girl!
EM: I AM a good girl. But I'm ready to go home.
MK: Oh, Ellie.
EM: Oh, Ellie, what?!? PUT. MY. LID. DOWN. We're going home.
MK: I'm sorry, Ellie. I want to make sure you stay healthy.
Vet: Come here, pretty girl.
EM: Pretty? I guess you aren't blind. THANK YOU FOR NOTICING. They must've taught you taste in vet school!
Vet: This vet tech is named xxxx, she's going to hold you now.
EM: WHAT?!? Where's Giggles?!? Bear told me to ALWAYS ask for Giggles McGiggly!
Vet: I don't know who that is.
EM: That's her NAME! I guess you don't bother with names. I mean, you have my chart RIGHT THERE and you had to ask who I am!
Vet: This is certainly an ... interesting visit.
EM: No one's ever called me interesting before!
{Pause}
EM: Okay. You and this vet tech can touch me, but be quick!
© 2022 Momma Kat and Her Bear Cat - Written and Published by Katherine Kern.
All text, pictures, images, and other content are original and copyright by Momma Kat and Her Bear Cat [K. Kern], 2015-2022. No content on Momma Kat and Her Bear Cat may be used without the owner's [K. Kern] written permission. If you see this post posted on a site that isn't Momma Kat and Her Bear Cat, please contact cats@mommakatandherbearcat.com.
Bear's adventures at the vet are legendary ...
- Kitty trauma drama.
- Bear's pay-back [Kitty trauma drama, part 2].
- Giggles McGiggly (This is when Bear first meets Giggles).
- Coordinated holding cells.
- Bear's [beyond, then NOT] bad day, Part 2.
- Meow McQuacky-Pants & Bear's Food Time.
- Bear's cat rapping show hits the road.
- Bear's cat rapping show hits the road, part 2.
AMARULA: I can't believe you didn't bite the vet! Bear would have taken a big chunk out of the vet! And asked to see officially notarized copies of the vet's university diploma!
ReplyDeleteI hate to burst your bubble, but ummm ... Bear never bit the vet. He was too scared. Not to speak badly of the boxed ... ~Ellie Mae
DeleteEveryone knows that you look with your eyes and not with your hands! What the fluff! I hope you got some treats at least.
ReplyDeleteI should've thought of that! Look with your eyes ... not your hands! Hahaha! ~Ellie Mae
DeleteThat vet must be wondering whatever just happened!
ReplyDeleteShe said she has cats, so she probably understands :) ~Ellie Mae
DeleteEllie I am DELIGHTED to hear from you agan! Ad see you, you totally gorheous girl. Your sisfur is gorgeoud too, but I wanted to see me some ELLIE MAE! You handled your v-e-t visit very well.
ReplyDeleteThis is me, Katie.
DeleteHa! I have more to me than most people think! [and not just in weight!] ~Ellie Mae
DeleteWouldn't it be wonderful if vets could talk to their patients, like Dr. Doolittle?
ReplyDeleteStill don't think many cats will want to go for a 'visit', though.
I'm not falling for that again, that's for sure! ~Ellie Mae
DeleteThat was an interesting chat with the vet!
ReplyDeleteI think she would've preferred to be elsewhere :) ~Ellie Mae
DeleteGood job, Miss Ellie and I'm sure the visit truly was the most interesting one of May!
ReplyDeleteHahaha. I see what you did there! ~Ellie Mae
DeleteWe'll bet your vet will remember THAT visit!
ReplyDeleteI aim to be memorable :) ~Ellie Mae
DeleteMOL your poor vet! Well, you were "visiting"...
ReplyDeleteShe wasn't very welcoming! The least she could've done is give me a Squeeze-up for my troubles! ~Ellie Mae
DeleteYou are so funny, Ellie! You sure showed that vet who's boss. I hope that your examination went well. Your vet is right - you are a very beautiful girl.
ReplyDeleteThank you for noticing! ~Ellie Mae
DeleteOh Ellie, Bear would be very proud of you having all that fun at the Vet place!
ReplyDeleteFUN? That wasn't fun! I was just giving that vet what she deserves ... err ... mostly. ~Ellie Mae
DeleteYou tell them, Ellie! Look but no touch, right? And yes, Bear would be extra proud of you. XO
ReplyDeleteI should've said that! Still, you're right, I did pretty good! ~Ellie Mae
DeleteYou survived the vet? In that case you did good. Cat health is a big thing with cat parents for some reason. Toulouse.
ReplyDeleteI wonder how much shorter our lives are for having to go to the vet. ~Ellie Mae
DeleteSounds like you thoroughly confused that vet, Ellie Mae! Good job!
ReplyDelete[Cough] Is ... umm ... Woodrow proud? ***blushing*** ~Ellie Mae
DeleteSorry you had to go to the vet. Sounds like you made her work hard though. :)
ReplyDeleteI'm good at playing hard to get! ~Ellie Mae
Deletethiz commint haz nothin ta
ReplyDeletedue with thiz post… we wanna
say HI ina hurree…. coppee N
paste helpin two day….now
coz oh data time we hafta
scurree😸😸❤️❤️
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