Ellie Mae's bad day, part 2

January 21, 2020

Ellie Mae had a horrible day and she can't wait to tell everyone about it. For poor Ellie, things are about to get much worse than she originally thought! If you missed the first part of the story of Ellie's bad day, you may find it here: Ellie Mae's bad day.

BC: Bear Cat Kat [handsome tabby cat and Momma's Handsome Stripe-y Pants]

EM: Ellie Mae Kat [black, gorgeously floofy cat]

MK: Momma Kat [Bear and Ellie's human Momma, named Kat]

The Boy: Momma's fiance

The Boy: You had a horrible day, right, Ellie?
EM: YEAH!
The Boy: Though you didn't notice I was gone because I was at work?
EM: What's that have to do with anything?
The Boy: You didn't miss me because Momma is your favorite.
EM: Haven't we been over this several times?
The Boy: You don't remember messaging with me?
EM: Err ... I thought you were ... err ... hmm. I mean, I wasn't looking for you, so I didn't really notice ...
BC: {from the other room} That's my stupid sister!
EM: Shut up, you soggy panoramic cobweb!
BC: {from the other room} What the ...
EM: Who's stupid now!?
BC: {from the other room} Nice touch. Confuse with nonsense.
EM: Nonsense? I spout nonsense? NONSENSE IS YOUR MIDDLE NAME!!!
The Boy: She's got a point ...
BC: {from the other room} SHE'S got a point? I have TWENTY-TWO points. Would you like to get to know my little friends?
EM: Can we get back to talking about my bad day now?
The Boy: Your bad day started when you lost your favorite red sparkle ball ...
EM: {screeching} WHAT?!
BC: {from the other room} Hit the deck! She's gonna blow!
EM: NO! My favorite toy is the PURPLE YARN ball - NOT the red sparkle ball! How many times do I have to tell you that!? Phht. How can you be my favorite when you don't even know WHICH TOY IS MY FAVORITE TOY?
The Boy: ... then you stepped in Bear's stinky poop ...
EM: As if I don't already deal with enough of Bear's crap! I wade through it all day every day!

BC: {from the other room} You're welcome!
The Boy: ... then you missed your 12:51 pm nap and a bug because you were cleaning your foot of Bear's stinky poop, and you thought your people had abandoned you.
EM: Well, Momma. I thought MOMMA abandoned me. You were here somewhere.
The Boy: Didn't I JUST say I was gone all ... oh, never mind. Happy cat, no bat.
BC: {from the other room} I prefer, "lie, don't die."
EM: YOU LIE TO ME?
BC: {from the other room} Of course not!
EM: Oh, okay.
The Boy: WHAT? You believe what Bear ...
EM: I couldn't find Momma and I mournfully let everyone know that I'd been abandoned. She came out of the bedroom and picked me up and carried me to bed with her. Then she pet me!
The Boy: What's wrong with that?
EM: I was all paranoid Bear would attack me! I kept looking around to make sure he wasn't mad and about to chase me off. The bed is his ... Momma is his ... or at least that's what I let him think.
BC: {from the other room} EXCUSE ME?
EM: You're my brofur!
BC: {from the other room} And you're my a$$fur!
EM: Really? REALLY?!?! You want to get into this again?
BC: {from the other room} Err ...
The Boy: Again?
EM: That's right. You SHOULD be afraid of me.
BC: {from the other room} I'm not afraid of you ... {mumbling} except that you might sit on me and catcake me.
EM: WHAT WAS THAT about catcaking?
BC: {from the other room} Err ... I said that I'm glad you're not as big as Momma's butt because you'd catcake me.
MK: HEY!
BC: {from the other room} SCREWED BY WOMEN EVERYWHERE and still alive!
EM: You're screwed? When I was done getting ear rubs from Momma, I came out here to take a nap, and you were in my box!

EM: ANOTHER NAP RUINED! Then Momma got up and used the computer and I messaged with Daddy. While I messaged Daddy, I found the proof of his secret betrayal!
The Boy: What?!
EM: HERE! See what I found on Momma's computer!

BC: {from the other room} What is it? Is she looking at other cats? And can we use it to blackmail her?
EM: Daddy, how could you?
BC: {from the other room} Wait ... THE BOY has incriminating evidence on Momma's computer? I have to see this!
EM: And this is the worst one!

BC: WHAT?!? Where did these come from? I've been framed! SCREWED! I've lost all street cred!
MK: Calm down, Bear.
BC: Calm down? CALM DOWN? THIS RUINS EVERYTHING!
{Pause}
BC: Et tu, The Boy!?
EM: That's not very nice!
BC: What is she talking about?
EM: Eff YOU!
BC: Et tu!
EM: Eff you too!
MK: ELLIE!
EM: What? Bear started it!
BC: Et tu!
EM: Eff YOU!
BC: Hey, now! Eff YOU!
EM: Eff you, more!
BC: Eff you, the most!
EM: Err ...
MK: That got out of hand quickly.
EM: Bear started it!
MK: No ... he was saying, "Et tu," meaning, "you too?" NOT "Eff you."
EM: I kept walking across Momma's keyboard, but she STILL ignored me. Momma was ignoring ME! And then I find out Daddy's cheating on me!
The Boy: You told me about your bad day by Messenger, remember?

EM: Yeah, but I wanted MOMMA'S attention and she was too busy working to give me ear scratches! I ALMOST fell off the table! It was horrible!
The Boy: But you got to talk to me!
EM: SO? You're not my Momma!
The Boy: Great. So what else happened?
EM: I got really hungry trying to get attention from Momma, but when I went to my food plate, all the dried up bits of wet food were GONE! I smelled food in this plastic ball thing ... but the food was TRAPPED in the ball!
MK: We tried the puzzle feeder.
EM: WE didn't try anything! I sat there staring at the ball for an hour and no food came out!
MK: Ellie, I showed you how to roll it to get the food out.
EM: Phht. Like I work for my food! Who do I look like? A human? I gave it my dirtiest look ... and NO FOOD! I begged Momma to give me some food and she gave me a Squeeze-up, but then some of it was stuck on my nose and she and Bear were laughing at me! I couldn't figure out where the food I could smell was - until Bear came up to me and licked my nose. THAT WAS MY SQUEEZE-UP! Then Momma brought a box inside and it was our new kibble, but I couldn't figure out how to get in the bag!

BC: She huffed and puffed ...
EM: FOILED AGAIN! So I went to the food bowl, and Bear was guarding it! He wouldn't let me eat!
MK: You two have another kibble bowl.
EM: What's that have to do with anything?
MK: Never mind.
EM: And then ... AND THEN!!! I smelled something like tasty chickens and I ate it!
The Boy: That's not so bad ...
MK: It was toothpaste I'd put on a toothbrush to take care of the cats.
EM: BLECH! But I got even!
The Boy: You did?
EM: YES! Momma was all ready to brush our teeth, brush our fur, clip our claws and give Bear his medicine ... so I ran away from her!
The Boy: You do that every night.
EM: I know! But this time, as she was chasing after me, Momma tripped over my favorite scratcher and landed on my second favorite scratcher, breaking it in half!

MK: Don't you two think it's odd that you both complain about how mean I am to both of you, but somehow I'm the only one hurt when I clip your claws and brush your teeth?
BC: You wouldn't trip if you watch where you're going! That's not OUR fault!
EM: YEAH!
MK: Oh? Maybe we have too much cat stuff and we should get rid of that scratcher I tripped over.
EM: {GASP!!!} That's not even funny to joke about, Momma.
BC: Don't worry. She wouldn't get rid of THAT scratcher, because it's the only one I use.
EM: But ... but ... my other scratcher was broken in half! Momma BROKE it!
MK: You're lucky I didn't break.
EM: What does that have to do with anything?
MK: And what about last week when I bled all over the place because Mr. Tough Pants resented having his teeth brushed?
EM: So I ran to the cat tree corner to hide, but Bear got there first! Then Momma caught me because the only place I had to hide was behind my favorite scratcher! And Momma got toothpaste in my eye!
MK: Maybe you shouldn't squirm when I'm brushing your teeth.
EM: I HATE YOU!
The Boy: Wait wait wait ... Momma does all this horrible stuff to you and she's still your favorite?
EM: Err ...
{Crickets}
EM: Well ... but you're not Momma!
The Boy: I don't do all that horrible stuff to you and Momma's still your favorite?
EM: Err ... I hear my cabbage juice and deer hammer's tail swishing ... I better go check them out. BYE!
The Boy: HER WHAT?
BC: Don't look at me! She's a WOMAN! She's not supposed to make sense.
MK: {AHEM!}
BC: Err ... except you, Momma. You're not really a woman.
MK: Oh?
BC: Err ... I think I'm going to have a really bad day.

All text, pictures, images, and other content are original and copyright by Momma Kat and Her Bear Cat [K. Kern]. No part of my post may be used without my written permission. If you see this post posted on a site that isn't Momma Kat and Her Bear Cat, please contact cats@mommakatandherbearcat.com.

Featured posts:

If you missed the first part of the story of Ellie's bad day, you may find it here: Ellie Mae's bad day.
If you missed The Boy's slight of Ellie and her tuna smoothies: Momma's birthday.