The package {part 1}; #ChewyInfluencer

As I talked about last week, sometimes I procrastinate and procrastinate on a review in search of perfection - until it's not even necessary or useful anymore. We've been hanging onto a couple reviews - so we're calling this week, "review week!" We already reviewed a book (Cat Tails - Heart-Warming Stories about the Cats and Kittens of RESQCATS: blog tour/review) and a cat bed (Smiling Paws Pets 2-in-1 cat cube). Today (part 1) and tomorrow (part 2) - we have two reviews as part of the Chewy Influencer program. It's our first month as part of the program - so we're especially excited to share our experiences with Chewy and the items we tried.

Disclosure: We received Fancy Feast Purely Natural Tuna Filets Cat Food Topper, 10 count - for free in exchange for an honest review. Momma Kat and Her Bear Cat only shares information we believe would be of interest to our readers. The content is ours - neither Fancy Feast nor Chewy are responsible for the contents of this post.

BC: Bear Cat
EM: Ellie Mae
MK: Momma Kat
The Boy: Momma's fiance

{The doorbell rings}
BC: {running around crazily between the windows} HUH?!? They're here to kill me! They're here to kill me! They want my brains! My superior intellect!
EM: Superior? Congratulations! I think everything in those couple sentences were the equivalent of our litter box deposits...
BC: {stopping his frantic, panicked running} Who asked you, Smellie?

BC: {back to running around crazily from window to window} I KNEW IT! I kept telling Momma they'd come for me - but she refused to listen! I need to hide! I need to get out of here so they can't beam me up to their ship! Wait a ...

{Pause}
BC: ALUMINUM FOIL! I need aluminum foil, Momma! I need to wrap myself in the stuff! It's the only thing that will prevent me from being beamed up to the their ship!
EM: Oh ... for the love! Last time Momma got out the aluminum foil, you thought it was mocking you. And then you ran under the bed because of the noise it makes.
{Bear hears Momma open the front door}
BC: You're working with them! WHAT?! Did you sell me out for a dozen doughnuts?!? Or did Smellie sell me into servitude?
EM: Don't look at me ... but just saying ... if I could sell you into servitude, how would I go about it? Is there a website for that?
MK: Knock it off you two. We got a package.
BC: I don't know what that's a euphemism for ... you know ... in non-cool kid slang ...
MK: It's on the far side of the porch!
BC: {GASP} It's not a "package!" It's their ship! {using his paws} Is it about this big?
MK: Umm ... actually, yes.
BC: I KNEW IT! CLOSE THE DOOR! Are there little purple elephant-like ... err ... I better check for us because I can't describe what I saw in my dream.
EM: It wasn't a dream! That was gas. I told you cheese and catnip before bed was a bad idea.
BC: Shut up, Smellie! You act like I haven't lived this long for a reason.
EM: Ummm ... because you have NINE LIVES?!
BC: That's just a rumor.
EM: You're right ... you're still alive because Momma protects you from your own stupidity.
BC: I ... CLOSE THE DOOR! I mean it! If you don't close the door, they'll catnap me!

EM: You catnap yourself for eighteen hours a day.
BC: I'm about to be abducted by THEM and all you can do is make jokes about how much I sleep?!
EM: You're right. I should be throwing a party!
BC: You'll miss me when you're gone, you know.
EM: Why would they take ME!?!
BC: I wasn't talking about ME leaving ...
MK: It's raining cats and dogs out there.
BC: NO! NO! Don't go out there!
MK: There aren't any aliens, Bear.
BC: Famous last words. Ask the dinosaurs how that worked out for them!
MK: Bear ...
BC: Wait a ... it's RAINING cats AND dogs? I've got to see this! It sounds messy. If I were you, I wouldn't go out there. You might end up with a brain injury and then you'll forget ...
{Pause}
BC: Oh. Wait. You already do.
MK: Do what?
BC: Forget to feed us.
MK: I do not! The Boy took over kibble duty. And he doesn't forget..
BC: Not with the good food.
MK: It's the SAME food!
BC: And it's tasted especially foul ever since.
MK: You seem to eat it just fine.
BC: A cat's got to eat. It doesn't mean I'm not starvatating!
EM: Ummm ... given the definition of starvation ...
BC: SHUT UP, Fatso! STARVATATION is not the same thing as STARVATION. It's a matter of degree.
MK: As fascinating as this conversation is, I'm going out to get the box. It looks like the box from Chewy!
BC: Chewbacca sent us a ...
EM: Who's Chewbacca?
BC: {keeping an eye on the package/"THEIR ship"} Momma's last boyfriend. Hahahahahahaha.

MK: We joined the Chewy Influencer network. Each month, we'll get one or two items to try out from their vast selection of pet products.
BC: Do they stock tasty whole chickens?
MK: I don't think so.
BC: HMPH. Then they don't have a vast selection! What's a selection without tasty whole chickens?
{Pause}
BC: Do they have a suggestion box?!
MK: I wouldn't know. You could just be grateful we get to try yummy food.
BC: So now we're guinea pigs? I bet I won't like anything they send. "Yummy" remains to be seen ...
EM: You mean tasted?
BC: Tasted what?
EM: Yummy is tasted, not seen.
BC: SHUT UP, Smellie!
MK: Did I mention that one of our items this month is tuna filets?
EM: Hard to argue with that.
BC: Oh, FINE! I'll try them. But I want the record to note that I'm under duress.
EM: Yeah, sure. You're under duress to eat tuna. Only if you have gas afterwards.
BC: Shut up. And leave my gas out of this!
EM: I beg you to leave your gas out of this all the time, but it doesn't stop you from spreading it around does it?
MK: {walking back in from outside} Okay, kittens! Who wants some food?

{Silence}
MK: How about we try the Purely Fancy Feast Tuna Filets first?!
BC: TUNA?!?!
MK: Yep. All natural tuna.

BC: Is it diet food? Because you're only generous with the diet food!
MK: No.
BC: YAY!
MK: Look at this great Chewy box! Our blogger kitty friends always comment on how wonderful Chewy's boxes are.
EM: Umm ... I don't know ...
{Ellie watches the box and then checks it out}

BC: Eh. You been in one box ...
MK: And there's packing paper.
BC: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-HOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
The Boy: Great. Like we need more paper. The second bedroom's floor is COVERED with that stuff - and it doesn't even include the stuff out here.
BC: Phht. One can never have too much ...
{Bear turns around to see Ellie on "his" paper}

BC: #$%! ^*&# sisters! Come on ... MOVE!
EM: No. You can't make me! You're not the boss of me.
BC: Oh, YEAH?!
{Bear whaps Ellie on the nose}
EM: HEY!
BC: You didn't move far enough! Come on! Get off my paper!
EM: Whatever.

MK: Tuna?!?!
BC: HIIIII!
EM: What were we arguing about?
BC: I don't remember.
MK: Whoa! These filets are HUGE!
{Momma sets the filet on a plate}
EM: Bear?!
BC: Huh?
EM: What are we supposed to do with it?!?
BC: Eat it, dummy!
EM: But HOW?! It's just one huge chunk!
MK: You two should see yourself staring at the tuna filet ... you look like you're expecting it to dress in drag and dance or something!
BC: Tuna in drag? Flounder?!?
MK: Here ... I'll break it up for you ...
BC: HURRY UP!
EM: Oh! Oh! I LOVE TUNA!!!
BC: Get out of my way!
{The cats scarf down the pieces of the tuna filet}

BC: Nomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnom ...
MK: BEAR! BREATHE!
BC: NOMNOMNOMNOM ...
MK: It's not a competition!
BC: Phht. Of course it is. We have to see who eats more!
MK: That good?!?!
BC: Talk to Ellie, I'm busy!

MK: The filet is too big for one cat - and more than I'd usually give you two as a treat. But you two love their tuna treats - so I figured this would be a hit.
{Silence as the cats nom}
MK: I really like that it's all natural, 100% tuna! Chewy sells the Fancy Feast Purely Natural Tuna Filets Cat Food Topper in a ten count.
EM: OH! NINE MORE FILETS?!?!? I better get moving so we can eat the rest of them!

BC: DON'T even THINK about it!
MK: Looks like everyone's happy! Chewy is easy to love: they have a wide selection of QUALITY pet products, freshness is guaranteed, and they offer fast shipping and easy returns on all orders. With orders over $49, one to two day shipping is FREE! After hearing so many bloggers talk about Chewy's fast shipping, I was eager to see the difference for myself ... and sure enough! FAST! Much faster than any other seller I've encountered. Though my favorite part is 24/7 customer service. How many times have I been up late at night shopping for cat supplies, had a question, but couldn't ask it because chat wasn't available?
{Light snoring is heard}
EM: WHA?! Not AGAIN ...
BC: HEY! She was boring me with the details. We're CATS! Does it taste good? YES! That's what we care about.
{Pause}
BC: HEY! That was from MY pile of tuna!
EM: Finders keepers ...
BC: More like fatty's fatter.
{Ellie steals another bit from Bear's pile}
BC: HEY! Eat your own!
EM: Momma?!? You should probably order some more ...

TO BE CONTINUED ... is the second product we're trying courtesy of Chewy a hit too?!?!