MK: Momma Kat
BC: We need to have a talk.
MK: Well ...
BC: I don't like having my teeth brushed, you know!
MK: I'm well aware. It's hard to miss the claws and fangs. Fangs you only still have because I brush your teeth regularly.
BC: Don't change the topic.
MK: But ...
BC: And when you get really sick and need outside help, I go off to the kennel!
MK: Well, TECHNICALLY it's a pet resort.
BC: But you're not there so it sucks no matter WHAT it's called!
MK: And they don't brush your teeth either.
BC: But they don't snuggle with me or play with me or stick the stupid picture box in my face! Wait a ... WHOSE SIDE AM I ON?!?!
MK: I'll give you treats not to out me online.
BC: How many?
MK: Err ... double the usual?
BC: NOPE.
MK: Four times the usual?
BC: Nope.
MK: An entire bag?
BC: Nope. My silence isn't cheap.
MK: Let's not exchange one problem for another.
Featured post of the Day:
Momma and Bear also discussed Bear's role in saving Momma from her "crazy" here: Momma's "crazy." And for a more light-hearted touch on Bear's "job:" Bear's job.
MK: Are you talking to me?
BC: Sit down, Momma.
MK: Errr ... okaaaaay.
BC: You're in trouble.
MK: Excuse me?
BC: I've been WATCHING. And you're in T-R-O-U-B-L-E.
MK: Care to be more specific?
BC: I've noticed your days stretching out again so that you're eating only two meals in two days and calling it ONE day.
MK: (BLEEP)!
BC: Thought I didn't notice?
MK: I'm the only former anorexic with a cat that has an international audience.
BC: I have a blog ... and I'm not afraid to use it. And if you keep up the stretching, the former won't be former anymore. It hasn't escaped my attention that you're not eating the proper number of meals in a twenty-four hour day.
MK: Bear ....
BC: Nope. I don't wanna hear it.
MK: But ...
BC: When you stretch YOUR days, MY days get stretched too. It starts with just a few hours and then before you know it, I'm getting my wet food treat only every other 24 hour day since you start defining one day as 48 hours!
MK: But that also means you only get your teeth brushed every other 24 hour day too.
BC: That's a different topic for a different day!
MK: Bear ...
BC: Nope. If you brush my teeth because it's "GOOD" for me, you have to do what's good for you too - EVEN IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT!
BC: You're in trouble.
MK: Excuse me?
BC: I've been WATCHING. And you're in T-R-O-U-B-L-E.
MK: Care to be more specific?
BC: I've noticed your days stretching out again so that you're eating only two meals in two days and calling it ONE day.
MK: (BLEEP)!
BC: Thought I didn't notice?
MK: I'm the only former anorexic with a cat that has an international audience.
BC: I have a blog ... and I'm not afraid to use it. And if you keep up the stretching, the former won't be former anymore. It hasn't escaped my attention that you're not eating the proper number of meals in a twenty-four hour day.
MK: Bear ....
BC: Nope. I don't wanna hear it.
MK: But ...
BC: When you stretch YOUR days, MY days get stretched too. It starts with just a few hours and then before you know it, I'm getting my wet food treat only every other 24 hour day since you start defining one day as 48 hours!
MK: But that also means you only get your teeth brushed every other 24 hour day too.
BC: That's a different topic for a different day!
MK: Bear ...
BC: Nope. If you brush my teeth because it's "GOOD" for me, you have to do what's good for you too - EVEN IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT!
{Picture of Bear hiding from Momma back in his cat tree corner where she can't reach him ... because he doesn't want his teeth brushed.}
MK: Well ...
BC: I don't like having my teeth brushed, you know!
MK: I'm well aware. It's hard to miss the claws and fangs. Fangs you only still have because I brush your teeth regularly.
BC: Don't change the topic.
MK: But ...
BC: And when you get really sick and need outside help, I go off to the kennel!
MK: Well, TECHNICALLY it's a pet resort.
BC: But you're not there so it sucks no matter WHAT it's called!
MK: And they don't brush your teeth either.
BC: But they don't snuggle with me or play with me or stick the stupid picture box in my face! Wait a ... WHOSE SIDE AM I ON?!?!
MK: I'll give you treats not to out me online.
BC: How many?
MK: Err ... double the usual?
BC: NOPE.
MK: Four times the usual?
BC: Nope.
MK: An entire bag?
BC: Nope. My silence isn't cheap.
MK: Let's not exchange one problem for another.
BC: How about you just knock off your problem?
MK: I'll try.
BC: Nope. NOT good enough. You're the one who always says people who say 'try' are just making an excuse because they don't want to actually change.
MK: I find it bizarre that despite all the things you don't hear or don't remember me saying, you remember this. Anyone who was confused by my couple statements on this blog that you know just as well what I shouldn't do as you know what YOU shouldn't do now know that claim is true.
BC: You're welcome. Better than weighing 75 lbs and landing in the hospital.
MK: Well, I'm a long way from ...
MK: Well, I'm a long way from ...
{Pause}
BC: {AHEM} This is your official intervent!
MK: What?
BC: Intervention ... intervent?
MK: Intervening?
BC: Are you going to stop stretching out your days and meals which otherwise would lead to you dropping copious amounts of weight?
MK: Uhh ... okay.
BC: Then I don't care what you call it.
MK: Well, technically YOU'RE the one trying to label ...
MK: Well, technically YOU'RE the one trying to label ...
MK: Okay. You drive a hard bargain.
BC: I take this job very seriously.
MK: And I have the scars to prove it.
BC: No. Those are just the icing on my proverbial cake.
MK: I love you, Bear. You're such a good boy.
BC: {narrowing his eyes} What do you mean by "good boy?" I'm not a dog.
MK: I mean you're the perfect boy kitty for me. You're very affectionate and easy to love. But you're also your own cat and I love that part of you just as much.
BC: So it's not so much that I'm "good," and more that you like my comprehensive personality?
MK: Yes.
BC: Did I make you mad at least once today?
MK: Why do you ask?
BC: Just wondering.
MK: Probably.
BC: That makes me a good cat.
MK: Yeah, it probably does. But I wouldn't want it any other way.
BC: Me neither.
{Pause}
BC: I love you, Momma. That's why I worry about you.
MK: I know.
Pictures of the Day:
How can anyone resist this face? Especially when all it wants is its Momma to be happy and healthy.
And the love that's enough to save a life (namely Momma's) ...
BC: I take this job very seriously.
MK: And I have the scars to prove it.
BC: No. Those are just the icing on my proverbial cake.
MK: I love you, Bear. You're such a good boy.
BC: {narrowing his eyes} What do you mean by "good boy?" I'm not a dog.
MK: I mean you're the perfect boy kitty for me. You're very affectionate and easy to love. But you're also your own cat and I love that part of you just as much.
BC: So it's not so much that I'm "good," and more that you like my comprehensive personality?
MK: Yes.
BC: Did I make you mad at least once today?
MK: Why do you ask?
BC: Just wondering.
MK: Probably.
BC: That makes me a good cat.
MK: Yeah, it probably does. But I wouldn't want it any other way.
BC: Me neither.
{Pause}
BC: I love you, Momma. That's why I worry about you.
MK: I know.
Pictures of the Day:
How can anyone resist this face? Especially when all it wants is its Momma to be happy and healthy.
And the love that's enough to save a life (namely Momma's) ...
Not much gets past you, Bear, and thankfully us cats are there to make up for missed meals with the odd Red Cross emergency food delivery package. Now if a peep has ever tried getting a red cross on a moving mouse then said peep will appreciate what a wonderful gift this is, and not waste the meal. Failing that, do snuggle loads and maybe let peep have a KitKat, or three, with side order of pizza and a side side order of cream. purrs ERin PS has your peep tried fish? I don't do them myself but peep goes a bundle on them every day and swears by them.... mind you that could be because they keep trying to jump back in the aquarium. Mouses!
ReplyDeleteNo kidding. The humans would starve without our hunting prowess :)
DeleteBear, you're such a sweetheart to worry about and take such good care of your wonderful Momma!
ReplyDeleteWe're pretty lucky to have each other :)
DeleteYou are a very good kitty to keep an eye on your Momma. You are both lucky to have one another.
ReplyDeleteI agree. Don't tell her that though ... she might get "ideas."
DeleteOhhhh those last few photos just melted my heart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bear you are such a good kitty! xoxoxo catchatwithcarenandcody
ReplyDeleteI have the melting effect on the ladies :)
DeleteStay on her, Bear...don't let her get away with the that day stretching stuff. ;)
ReplyDeleteI can be VERY persistent!
DeleteAnimals are such a wonderful reason to take care of ourselves, even when it's hard too. I know Bear would be lost without you, and wouldn't ever understand why. And Bear, you're doing a great job taking care of Momma, she has a good heart and deserves to feel good and strong and loved each day!
ReplyDeleteAnd she feeds me! ;)
DeleteSadly, it is our burden to watch over our hoomons. They call themselves our caretakers, but really we are the ones who take care of them. Without us, they would watch too much TV and forget that life has a purrrpose. Good job on taking care of your meowmy. I'm sending healing purrs just in case you run low. Have a Wonderpurr day!
ReplyDeleteTrue. Though my Momma does go around telling people that even though I was homeless and starving and she gave me a home and food, I was the one who rescued her. Nice how that works, isn't it?
DeleteBear, please take care of your momma! I know you do your best!
ReplyDeleteIt's hard, but someone has to do it! ~Bear Cat
Delete